"The Dating Game" subject of S抓sei part of "Experi柳ce 79 Project"
By DAVID FUJI NO
TORONTO」So you,re sitti叫4thome on a Saturday xiight You didn,t plan it this way; you got dump< ed again, that,saH,
Sure, we allw6ndもrぜ we,re attracti\^e to theother sex; and,Avliile(it,dUとe to bel〗ked, no one sc0re3100 pもr cent allthe time. You,ve got1^ see theャalueofypur self,ぉaving a lot of dat昨, orhaviifig few dM^esjおnb reason—iofallapai*t»
Then how如p卿le see you? Pro b a My the same way most of uss, others ー.at first glance. Welook at a person,s face and body. AI id in our minds we say something,like, "TVow! Would I iov6 to know you;" or, we might say soitie thing, Hke, "Jeez! Let,s forget this one." It's not right. People don,t know you; theyぉav-en,t even spoken to yoir, and already they,ve formed an opinion. It,s sad but true: our first reactionis、 are that unfair.
O.K. Since you,ve been loved, and been ignored, let,s consider wl^at quぉities youl〗ketc> see in a datも. Here,s alist of qualities: (1)Tall(2) Individualistic ")Lots of money (4) Fair-haired and fair-skinned (5) Interおting (6) Good dressed* (7) Sexy<8> Intemgent (9) Fun-loving (10) Affectionate.
Whatevetyoudiosefrom this1istofq似ぉii坊,it,s your decisi(iii: there's no right orwro?ig!|p» yoir ぷh0ices What we,re talking about is knowing whyj^ou have tertaih preferences after aII, theydori,t appear out ofthin ahv
Whatrm getting at is this: we Japanese f)ana: dians areinfluettced by th, white Canadian majority. Owr stan(?ards of physical bekuty arebfiがd oitthdr p h y si c a1characterおtics. Welook at ouまiveきwith tliiBir eyes. Andfors师e reason we haven,tgoiiゃ
きom5e of my JajiaHe$e Canadian friends feelthis "whi t "washed" mentality is I understandable and not necessarily baa, We,re horn and?aised〗n this society. Where else would we get our standards of beauty? Do you find your Maclt hair, ye How skin, and brown eyeみpretty or good-looking, or atleast o.k? The question is: Can ymi live comfortably in your own skin?
Another point. Do your
findpther Japanese Canadians.a U inactive? Or do you feelt hey do 11, tr measure up; theダlook "fimny" as if the3^ justゃoinもメfoff thebo珥t,,. iぇ you jfeelthat other Japお n粉e Canadians are" li" yourself, then youinight consider/looking in amir-
look. D(iiiHjuStcoihb yoi|* hまand br朋hケour teもth. "Takもa rゃalgoo idlook at y6ur self. Do y(>irlike what youき?...
'But ifeきinvドed,ぉh,]^ it? The„一ぉo婦of ihem, pretty supei^ficial— that aまa let jpeoj)Ie to辨^jh "hgr、 T J here iresomもゃl6ar. c;uもqualities ;" admirも; きt,sfors"re,like Iio卿-ty,loyalty, fairivess.Biit a smile? Alovelyac(ient when仿ey spe沐A "cute" facも丄which is not cute a it allネo so me one eぉもOut of such stuff are dates made
of.:;.::. '.
IjTwe then date the same person mo re than once: we,re usually after something. Or to phrase it more gjracefully, there must be sometWng of substknce to them; som纖ing you really like. Here the inteゅersonal plot thidcens and the "dating game" gets serious and more intricate.
Thもse days some co卯Ies are "living together," a form of setting up house without a marriagelicence. "When a couplefe加ore con-seri^"iye in their outlook they,llんaim ou I ice a fo?"mal "engagement" with a ring. Then there areゝゅuples who,veliv^edれgetheri prac" tically speaking, as mari and wife. To main(iain so-(jialconvention they announce きformal "もngage-ment" wil!h a ring This "engagement" period is traた ditionヌlly a testing period to dもterminewhethet or not a couple wishes to follow through w池marriage. You want to know you,rも一king the right choice illa tnarrぉge partner.
Being "もng?iged" is on ttie doorstep of mar由ge, The nice thingおthat you cain ailways break off, without any socmlsense of shame. Because you,re nQt 腦iTied- (In the case of "living together*' it,s a matter of economics- One, or botjipartners, wi" pay the bills — home, food, heating and phone bills — hut there is nothing which says it has to end in marriage. In fact, only one out of three common-law situa-
tions d(XE^ end in marriage.)
Choosing a marrigge paifレ ner wisely comes out of knowing yourself — as a Japan, Canadian, as a m肌or woman, and as a human being. I,ぉn,t easy, turiimg thぉset ho lights over in yo\u* mind, trying to understand what you feel fo3jranothもr peぉon.
Thai,s where otherぉople 《g|tt be a cQHifort, and of help. Such-an opportiinity tolearn from others,血nd sharもexperiences, is happening on Saiurdky,ひctcK ber 20th,さt the Ryersoyy Resource Centre (L72) at Vic. toria St: — (Jo uIdにThe a11-d aysfMninar, which starts汰t 8:加aum., is en.
titled "InteiNethnicヌela: tionships: • . : " ind will examine the range 6f 9u1: choices in friends an (J daねIig partners^ and化 lovもrs and spouses* Also, thiss柳inar willexaまne inter-racialand inter-ethnic relMoonships in termsojP
ィ
An歸ndftpiHTuI,lit Orgiiri for C^fkI<iionsMJopahcsi^Qri0In
VOL. 43 一 NO. 69
FRIDAY, SEPT.14,1979
TORONTO, ONTARIO
Asahi, as 'Mr. Umpire, at Tor.
TORONTO. 一 Former Va加ひuvei:Asゅi,s popular pi ayeIV Roy Yamamuralias been ho no ire d as "Mister
Umpife" foi: dedicated service at the conclusion of the 24th AnnualToronto Star Pee wee BasもbaU Touna-
U,S,Nj'sei judge rules in emotiorkil antHnuketricil with Toronto witness
SEATTLE—Thirty four years aぉo to the da)^ a<*sud-den fl础,,reducedlV)shiko Y03hikawa,s home to rubble andknockied heiv unconscious. When shもwoke up, Hiroshima was gone.
A Toronto reside" Mrs. Yoshikawa fought back the tears Aug.feaS she sat in the wiihessbQX, hpゅnぉup the last photographs he;r liuさband and daughter who died as a ?^esult of the atomic bomb dropped Aug. 6 ,1945 by the Uftited St atもs.
The fori^er Hir0shima rぉident was testifying at the trialof10 Canadian citizens diarged wUh trespassing on itheU.S. Navy's IW dent nuclcfai! submai'〗ne base at Bangor, Wash.
The defendants admitted violating thelaw but said they didれto pro test the "g卿tevH,,of the Tildent system, which they said would speもd up the arms T;ace and move the world closer to nuclear war.
They asked vぉiting US. District Court Judge Robert M Tak卿gi of Los Angeles to afequit them in thc^ nonjury trial, based on thie "necessity" to oppose Tri' dent and because the sub marine was a firstタtrifce weapon in Violation of inter-natiQnal】awv
Takasugifo叩"hきdefeか dさnぉto guilty oftrespass-
Ckmt. on IVige ?
ment held at the Canadian NationalExhibition on Auー 30,簡.
He was presented with a piague , wrist watch land two,utograゅedballl《rom til is year*s fin a list Weiland and St. CatHarines. This is the 24th straight year^ that he has b鄉called up on to umpire this most publicized to urilament.
Roy Yamamura has always been pQimlar with the fans forhiscolorhilwork. Playersゅd coachぉhave alw汰ys shown apprecision toward "Mr. I Imp" for his words of en CO Ullage nlent and adゃiceofまe?:ed from his vast years of "perieiice
Of the 32 top peewee teams (12ま13 years) in Ontario com])eting thぉ yea]^, ,e havenoti^ied only 2 Sansei pぉyせrs Shortstop Blake Toha叫ノof Heron ま ark a I id Pitcher Key in Nagano of M art in grove-There were also 4 Nぉei Head Coaches:
VisitingJ邵an像sesin织r附slavVe织sj
LAS VEGAS, Nev.. — A JaDanese entertainei^wcm 多290(,000 recentli^ on a dollar slot machine at the Flamingo I into n Hotelhei^e.
Singer Yoshio Tabata, 60, was playing the hotel,S "Pot of Gold" progressive slot, in which the payoff increases as money is fed into the machine, when he hit the record win.
PaulBurt, a spokesman for the strip resor仁said14
personshavもwon mo re than $2 million from the Pot of slots at the Flamingo and Las VegasHiUonHcK tels in the past14 months.
ftotelpublicists said that the vacationing Tabata started playing the slots with $100 worth of silver dollars. Hei^eportedly had 、von about §470 when bells and lights began to flash in reaction to the five "sevens,, on the machine's rollers.
Tabata, who is here with his wife, is popular among older Japanese for his traditional ballads. One of his trademarks is the electric guitar he uses to accompany himself.
The Hotelspokesman said the~Flamingo already does much business with Japanese tourists^ but added that when news of Tabata,s winnings reach Tokyo, he expects i*eservatibns to sky. rocket.